Life is about trying not to focus on the little things; like a tube the length of an NBA point guard going up your ass. Make the card extra fun with a colorful envelope liner for an extra cost. Certain paper liners are subject to availability. But all are fun :) Please be aware that you may not receive the "exact" section of the paper shown in the pic for the liners.
 
THE  DETAILS: "you will be getting a 6' long tube shoved up your asshole while you sleep; but try not to think about that." Added envelope liners are .50 and are based on which papers I have at the time. They are all pretty fun though. 
 
•    Card measures 5”x7” (A7) on bright white heavy matte card stock
•    Includes A7 bright white envelope
•    Blank inside for personal message
•    Ships in a clear plastic sleeve and protective mailer
•    Ships in 1-3 business days
 
If this card needs a small tweak so it’s perfect for you, please let me know how I can make that happen (gender, age, relationship, removing a curse word, etc…)